Do People Hate You? Could Be A Money Maker...

AH, ME--WHEN WILL THIS PATHETIC SCREED DIE?

Your faithful scribe recently had an interesting conversation with his good friend, Russell Friedman, he of the Grief Recovery Institute.

That conversation is about to become the foundation for this morning's pathetic weekly screed.

Why?

A couple of reasons.

Russell was the first person to note that your faithful scribe's signoff suddenly changed from "Your Short, Fat Creative Director in Park City" to "Your Lean, Mean Creative Director in Park City."

It took a couple of months for him to notice, and he was the first person to inquire about why the change.

THE "WHY" IS BECAUSE IT SEEMED LIKE GOOD JUJU

I'm in training for a triathlon, and being lean & mean was more appropriate to that task. It also better describes the brand reality of Slow Burn Marketing--a small company that runs on a shoestring budget (and routinely must turn down new clients.)

So, Russell gets a nod for paying attention to the details.

The other reason Russell gets special mention here is he's the first person to tell me he's sick of the regular references herein to this "pathetic weekly screed."

He wants to know when I'm going to stop calling it that.

DEAR RUSSELL: NEVER

Ya see, there's a certain, purposeful brand continuity here.

One of the things I really don't enjoy is the self-important gurus who send out regular newsletters that fancy themselves the most notable documents since the Magna Carta.

(NOTE: if you are a marketing guru reading this, know that I'm not speaking about you. I already know that I'm followed only by the best of the best, which is duly humbling.)

Know what?

Nothing I write is as important as the Magna Carta.

Yes, your faithful scribe rants.

Yes, your faithful scribe insults people. (Not on purpose, though, unless they deserve it.)

Yes, your faithful scribe occasionally discourses about details of marketing as if they were part of some grand, inscrutable puzzle written in Sanskrit.

Know what?

It's all amounts to a hill of beans in this crazy mixed up world where people act like quoting classic films is somehow a substitute for original thought.

And as part of this recognition of his own insignificance in the grand scheme of things, your faithful scribe is going to continue acknowleding the limited importance of what we do here.

IT'S ALL PART OF THE BRAND, MY FRIENDS

And the fact that it makes Russell unhappy does my heart good.

It's exactly the same as something my wife recently said.

She was really sick of some public figure whose name escapes me. (Apparently, I'm sick of this person, too.) And my wife said, "I can't stand her."

To which I replied, "Yep. But at least she makes you feel something."

There are plenty of people who read this pathetic weekly screed and probably despise it.

A few of you claim to love it (which does bring your judgment into question, but let's not go there right now).

But best of all?

THERE JUST AREN'T A LOT OF PEOPLE WHO ARE THOROUGHLY AMBIVALENT ABOUT HOT POINTS

Friends, a brand has to make people feel something.

Otherwise, it's not a brand.

It's just an amorphous load of hoohah taking up space.

When I go on a rant and grab a point by the neck and start shaking it until its eyes bug out, I know I've done a good thing if voicover emprasario Bob Souer emails and asks if he can republish it on his blog.

This is not to say a brand should be designed to offend. Unless you're in some kind of hipster business where offending people is part of the overall plan, being offensive for the sake of it is pointless.

But if you've done your job and you've figured out what your brand really is, guess what.

IT'S BOUND TO ANNOY SOMEONE

If it's done well, it's also bound to inspire someone else.

If it makes nobody feel anything but ambivalence, it's not a brand.

It's just a bowl of oatmeal.

And oatmeal is about as uninspiring as it gets.

So Russell, live with the fact that this is and shall remain your pathetic weekly screed for as long as it suits your faithful scribe.

I trust you'll keep reading, though--for it will eventually change at some point. And as much as you hate it, you're going to want to know when "screed" leaves and see what comes next.

Admit it: you're hooked.

Or maybe you're not.

Either way, welcome to the brand.